Once you’ve gotten settled in your relationship, you have to maintain an honest flow of communication and to continue to cherish your time with your loved one.
No matter how long you've been together, there are some simple, fundamental rules of the road. Putting them into practice isn't always easy, but it is critical. Make your relationship stronger, and the good stuff—fun, sex, trust, affection—will be better than ever.
Making a relationship last isn’t always fun, but the benefits of maintaining a long-term and committed relationship far outweigh the difficulties that you may face. If you want to know how to make your relationship last, just follow these tips.
You don’t have to plug this into your calendar, and hopefully you won’t have to, but you should make a conscious effort to make love at least one a week, no matter how tired you feel after work, or how much you have going on that week.
Boredom, frustration and everyday irritations can douse the spark between you and your partner—and more of the same certainly won’t feed the flame. Making the good stuff your top priority will. First, consider that it takes up to 20 positive statements to outweigh the harm done by one negative one. So compliment your girlfriend on her new shoes, or your boyfriend on his new blue shirt. Thank him for helping around the house. Dial her office for a quick “thinking of you” check-in. Be sure these compliments and thank-you’s are heartfelt and specific, and make eye contact when you smile.
Human touch aids the release of feel-good endorphins, for giver and receiver. So hold hands when you’re walking, and brush her cheek when you smooch good morning. Revive the ways you touched in the early days—a kiss on the back of the ear, a hand through her hair. Adding more of this kind of touch will help you build a fortress of love. That’s important, because a couple who form a tight unit can weather any storm (and are better able to stave off infidelity).
Honesty is the key to any long-lasting relationship. To keep your relationship strong, you should be able to be open and honest with your special someone. You should be able to share your most intimate thoughts and feelings with your loved one, or you’re not really communicating.
This is an important point. If you want to be in a long-lasting relationship, then you absolutely have to learn how to say you’re sorry from time to time. When it comes to a relationship, admitting you’re sorry is much more important than being stubborn.
It’s tempting to blame your partner when you feel angry, disappointed, bored, betrayed or stressed out about your relationship. The next step is seeing your mate as the one who must change for the relationship to improve. That’s a cop-out. Trying to improve your partner puts him or her on the defensive and casts you in a negative light. The result? Nobody changes. Nobody takes responsibility. Everyone is unhappy. And making your partner the bad guy means ignoring the 90 per cent of him or her that’s good.
Don’t start potentially tough talks if you’re not well rested and well fed. Hunger and fatigue can unleash nasty remarks and dark thoughts. Ban booze for the same reason. Save it for when you’ve achieved detente. That’s worth a toast. Don’t ever try to deal with serious marital issues if you’ve got one eye on something else. Turn off the TV, the phone, the laptop. If you’re distracted or going out the door, pick another time to talk. You can’t resolve conflicts on the fly.